How to Listen to Your Body During Menopause
I’m going to make an educated guess.
If you’re menopausal, and by that I mean perimenopausal or postmenopausal, because menopause itself is technically just one milestone, reached when you’ve gone 12 consecutive months without a natural period, there’s a good chance you were born in the 1970s or 1980s.
Which means you’ve lived through the low-fat era, the waif era, the keto era and just about every other diet trend in between.
You were told that weight management was simply a case of calories in versus calories out. All you needed was a little more willpower and discipline.
You were taught to outsource your understanding of your own body. To override your instincts, ignore the nudges, twinges and sometimes outright yells, and trust the latest expert, diet plan or wellness trend instead.
The reason I can make this guess is because I was that woman.
I’m the woman who looks back at photographs of herself in her 20s, 30s and 40s and now, at 52, thinks, what the hell was I worried about?!
I can look at a photograph and instantly remember how I felt that day.
Overweight. Insecure about the outfit I was wearing. Disappointed in myself because I hadn’t stuck 100% to whatever plan I was following in the hope of looking amazing for that particular event.
And the saddest part?
I look at those photographs now and realise there was absolutely nothing wrong with how I looked.
I just couldn’t see it at the time.
And now, at 52, with fluctuating hormones and a healthy dose of hindsight, I’ve gained something I didn’t have back then.
Perspective.
I realise that if I hadn’t spent so many years listening to what society thought I should look like, I might have spent a lot more time feeling happy, confident and comfortable in my own skin, without worrying quite so much about what anyone else thought.
So here’s something I’d love you to think about today.
When was the last time you listened to your body without immediately trying to change something about it?
I’ve had to learn and practise this myself. I’m brilliant at helping other people, haha, but when it comes to taking my own advice, well, that’s still a work in progress!
Because by the time we reach menopause, many of us have become experts at overriding our bodies rather than understanding them.
And menopause can make that relationship even more complicated.
Spend five minutes scrolling through menopause content on social media and you’d be forgiven for thinking it’s all downhill from here.
The weight gain, the hot flushes, the brain fog, the sleepless nights. The endless lists of things that can apparently go wrong.
And I don’t want to dismiss any of that. For some women, menopause symptoms are genuinely debilitating and can have an enormous impact on everyday life.
But I do want to offer another perspective.
Our bodies are extraordinary. Yet somewhere along the way, we’ve been taught to distrust them, override their signals and measure their worth against expectations that were never really ours.
We’ve spent so much of our lives trying to control our bodies that perhaps we’ve forgotten how to have a relationship with them.
And that’s what I want to explore today.
Because menopause isn’t just about understanding why your body is changing.
It’s also an opportunity to change the way you relate to it.
To stop fighting every change, start listening to what your body is communicating and learn how to give it the nourishment, care and support it needs.
Not to recreate the woman you were at 25.
But to feel happy, confident and at home in the body you have today.
Why Menopause Can Make You Feel Disconnected From Your Body
One of the most frustrating things about menopause is that your body can suddenly feel unfamiliar.
Perhaps you’ve always slept well, but now you’re waking at 3 am, wide awake, wondering how you’re going to get through another day on so little sleep.
Maybe you’ve always eaten a certain way, maintained a fairly stable weight and enjoyed regular exercise, but suddenly your body seems to be responding differently.
Or perhaps you’re feeling more anxious, irritable or overwhelmed by situations that wouldn’t have bothered you a few years ago.
It’s easy to start thinking you’re doing something wrong.
And because we’ve spent decades being told that our health, weight and wellbeing are simply a matter of making the right choices, our first instinct is often to try harder.
Eat less. Exercise more. Cut out another food group. Buy another supplement. Find another expert with another solution.
But here’s something I really want you to understand.
Menopause doesn’t just change your periods. It can change how you experience food, sleep, stress and even the environment around you.
Estrogen and progesterone don’t work in isolation. They interact with numerous systems throughout your body, influencing everything from temperature regulation and sleep to insulin sensitivity, muscle health, mood and digestion.
As hormone levels fluctuate during perimenopause and settle at lower levels after menopause, some of these systems can begin responding differently.
And when one system is under pressure, it can influence another.
Poor sleep, for example, can affect your appetite, energy, mood and how your body manages blood glucose. That can make it harder to feel motivated to move, prepare nourishing meals or cope with everyday stress.
Before you know it, you’re feeling exhausted, frustrated and disconnected from a body that used to feel familiar.
But none of this automatically means you’ve lost control, or that your body is failing you.
It means the circumstances in which your body operates are changing, and your approach to supporting it may need to change too.
Menopause Is a Natural Transition, Not a Disease
Something I think gets lost in the conversation around menopause is that our reproductive hormones are naturally changing for a reason.
Our ovaries aren’t designed to continue releasing eggs and producing the same levels of estrogen and progesterone throughout our entire lives.
As our reproductive years come to an end, ovarian hormone production naturally declines. Our bodies enter a different stage of life, with a different hormonal environment.
And while that transition can certainly be uncomfortable, sometimes incredibly so, lower hormone levels after menopause are not automatically evidence that something has gone wrong.
That doesn’t mean these hormones suddenly become irrelevant. Estrogen and progesterone have roles beyond reproduction, and changes in their levels can affect our health and wellbeing.
Nor does it mean we should simply put up with debilitating symptoms.
Hormone replacement therapy can be an appropriate and effective choice for many women, and particularly important in cases of early or premature menopause. But it isn’t something every woman automatically needs for the rest of her life simply because her reproductive years have ended.
For me, the important thing is that women understand what’s happening in their bodies and feel informed and supported in making their own decisions.
And whether you choose HRT or not, nourishing food, movement, sleep, stress support and looking after your future health still matter.
The aim isn’t to force our bodies to function as they did at 25. It’s to understand how to support them in the stage of life we’re living now.
This is why I believe understanding what’s happening beneath the surface is so important.
Rather than seeing every symptom as a separate problem that needs fixing, we can begin to explore the connections between them.
I’ve explored this in more detail in [Why Your Body Changes in Menopause, Even When You’re Doing Everything Right], where we look at why the approaches that worked for you in your 20s and 30s might not feel quite so effective now.
Of course, not every symptom is caused by menopause, and persistent or unusual changes shouldn’t simply be put down to hormones. Sometimes understanding your body means recognising when something needs medical investigation.
But the important thing is that we begin to replace judgement with curiosity.
Instead of asking, What’s wrong with me?
We can begin asking, What’s changed, what might be contributing to how I’m feeling, and what kind of support could help?
Because the more we understand how our bodies work, the better equipped we become to respond to what they’re telling us.
Your Body Has Been Communicating With You All Along
Think about how often your body gives you information throughout the day.
Hunger, tiredness, changes in digestion, cravings, energy dips, restless nights or feeling unusually overwhelmed.
Most of us have become so accustomed to pushing through these feelings that we barely stop to question them.
We reach for another coffee when we’re exhausted, skip meals because we’re busy, ignore digestive discomfort or feel guilty for needing an afternoon on the sofa.
But these everyday signals can tell us something about how our bodies are responding to the demands we’re placing on them.
The important thing is learning how to interpret that information, rather than jumping to conclusions.
This is where I like to use a simple approach:
Signal → System → Support
- Signal: What am I noticing? Perhaps I’m feeling unusually tired every afternoon.
- System: What might be contributing? Poor sleep, irregular meals, stress, hormonal changes or something that needs investigating?
- Support: What could help? A more nourishing lunch, better sleep routines, a little breathing space or a conversation with my GP, or at least tracking symptoms to see if there is a pattern.
It’s not about diagnosing yourself or assuming every symptom has a hidden meaning.
It’s about becoming curious enough to recognise patterns and make informed choices about what your body might need.
I explored this further in [What Your Menopause Symptoms Could Be Telling You About Your Body], where we look at the connections between common symptoms and the systems involved.
Because listening to your body isn’t about instinctively knowing all the answers. It’s about learning to ask better questions.
How to Reconnect With Your Body During Menopause
Reconnecting with your body doesn’t require another wellness routine, a complicated tracking app or a list of rules to follow.
In fact, I think the last thing most women need is another thing to add to their already overflowing to-do list!
It’s about making small changes to the way you respond to yourself throughout the day.
I like to think of it as four simple steps.
1. Notice Without Judgement
Start paying attention to how you feel, physically and emotionally.
Are you hungry? Tired? Restless? Comfortable? Energised?
You don’t need to analyse every sensation. Just begin noticing without immediately labelling it good, bad or something you need to fix.
2. Get Curious Rather Than Critical
Instead of telling yourself you’re lazy because you haven’t got the energy to exercise, consider what might be contributing to that tiredness.
Have you slept well? Eaten enough? Been under more pressure than usual?
Curiosity opens the door to understanding. Criticism usually just makes us feel worse.
3. Respond With Care
Sometimes your body needs nourishment. Sometimes movement, rest, connection or a little less pressure.
And sometimes it needs professional support.
The point isn’t to get the response perfect every time. It’s to begin making decisions based on what you’re learning about yourself rather than what you think you should be doing.
4. Build Trust Through Experience
The more you practise noticing, understanding and responding, the more familiar your body’s patterns may become.
You’ll begin recognising what helps you feel nourished, what leaves you feeling depleted and when something doesn’t seem quite right.
Trust isn’t about believing your body always knows the answer. It’s about becoming more confident in your ability to understand and care for it.
And perhaps the most liberating part of all this is realising that you don’t have to spend the rest of your life trying to control every change your body goes through.
You can learn to work with it instead.
Learning to Respect the Seasons of Your Life
One of the things I love about living more in tune with nature is the reminder that nothing stays the same forever.
The trees don’t spend autumn desperately trying to hold on to their leaves. They let them go, preparing for the next season.
And yet, as women, we spend so much of our lives resisting change.
We try to maintain the bodies we had in our 20s, the energy we had in our 30s and the expectations we placed on ourselves in our 40s.
All while juggling work, families, relationships and everyone else’s needs.
But perhaps one of the greatest gifts of reaching midlife is beginning to recognise that we don’t have to keep living that way.
I have no intention of spending my second half trying to recreate my first.
I don’t want to reach 70, look back at photographs of myself at 52 and realise I spent another 20 years worrying about things that never really mattered.
I want to enjoy my food without guilt. Move my body because it feels good. Rest when I need to, without feeling that I have to earn it.
I want to nourish myself, make choices that support my future health and have the energy to enjoy the life I’m living.
And I want that for you, too.
Of course, accepting change doesn’t mean resigning ourselves to feeling unwell or ignoring symptoms that deserve attention.
It means recognising that our needs can change, and giving ourselves permission to respond to them.
Just as nature moves through seasons of growth, abundance, rest and renewal, we can begin to respect the changing rhythms of our own lives.
Not every day has to be productive. Not every meal has to be perfect. And not every change in our body needs to become another problem to solve.
Perhaps reconnecting with your body begins when you stop asking it to be who it used to be and start appreciating what it can do for you today.
🌿 The Pantry Takeaway
If you only take one thing from this…
Your body isn’t a problem to solve. It’s constantly giving you information about how it’s responding to your environment, your lifestyle and the changes happening within it.
Menopause doesn’t mean you’ve lost control of your body. It can be an opportunity to stop trying to control every aspect of it and start learning how to work with it.
Notice. Get curious. Respond with care. Build trust.
You don’t need another diet, another set of rules or another reason to feel that you’re not doing enough.
You need understanding, nourishment and the confidence to make decisions that feel right for you.
Understand your body. Know how to nourish it.
Where Do You Go From Here?
Over this Libra moon cycle, we’ve explored what menopause symptoms might be telling us, why our bodies change and how we can begin to understand them rather than fight against them.
But understanding is only the beginning.
The next step is knowing how to support your changing body through everyday nourishment.
That’s exactly why I created The Menopause Pantry, a simple, real-food approach to nourishing your body without restrictive diets, complicated meal plans or another overwhelming checklist.
If you’re ready to bring a little more simplicity, confidence and pleasure back into your kitchen, you can start with my free Menopause Pantry resource.
Because menopause isn’t about becoming the woman you used to be.
It’s about learning how to care for the woman you are now.
🌙 This Week’s Moon Kitchen Recipe
Moon Phase: 🌗 Last Quarter | Support
Moon Kitchen Focus: Nourish the nervous system and respond to increased hunger with satisfying carbohydrates, protein, healthy fats, calcium and B vitamins.
This Week’s Recipe: Ricotta & Peach Baked French Toast Casserole
As we reach the Last Quarter Moon, it’s time to support rather than restrict. Mirroring the luteal phase, this is a point in the cycle when appetite can naturally increase and the body may ask for more satisfying, comforting foods.
And yes, French toast absolutely belongs here.
This Ricotta & Peach Baked French Toast Casserole combines wholegrain bread and fruit with protein-rich eggs and ricotta, creating a balanced mix of carbohydrates, protein and fats. The dairy and eggs also provide calcium and B vitamins including B2 and B12, supporting normal energy metabolism and nervous-system function.
Rather than fearing increased hunger, this phase invites you to respond to it. A warm, satisfying breakfast can be nourishment—not something that needs compensating for later.
Support your body. Feed your hunger. Enjoy your food.
👉 Make the recipe.
