Coping with your emotions, without using food.
This week I share this blog originally written two years ago. What a lot has happened since then!
Some things, however, don’t change.
Women are still being encouraged to restrict food in order to maintain their health when in fact the opposite usually happens, especially once we reach 40 and start our menopause journey.
This post explores how we use food in our daily lives, which is healthy and which we need to be more mindful of in order to support our long-term health.
Are you really hungry or just emotionally hungry?
The last 2-3 years have been unprecedented, no one has escaped the stress.
Do you remember how it began?
The sad news of the death of Caroline Flack lead to #BeKind trending.
We had to learn to be kind and more thoughtful of others, whether that was looking after family members in isolation, being considerate of people’s personal space when out and about and thinking about supporting small businesses that have suffered financially.
BUT, are we kind to ourselves?
How often have you berated yourself, talked negatively about yourself or beat yourself up in your head over what you have or haven’t eaten? Or whether you have exercised enough to burn off or earn your meals?
Part of becoming an Intuitive Eater means being gentle and compassionate towards yourself.
Intuitive eating teaches you to become curious as to why you have certain eating behaviours so you can investigate how you might make changes which will make you feel healthier or happier and take better care of yourself.
Our Emotional Connection to Food
Dieters are far more likely to suffer from emotional eating than those with no history of dieting. Emotional eating can just be a consequence of food restriction.
Unknown
Our emotional connection to food starts from birth.
We feed our crying child, we offer treats for injuries, we use food at celebrations, religious holidays and much more.
All of this deepens our emotional connection to food.
Food can be love, comfort, and support and is a constant through the positive and negative changes in our life.
Understanding the Role of Feelings
Eating with feelings can affect the ability to be attuned to the body.
If you feel guilty while eating something it should be because you did something BAD to get it like cheat or steal not because you are eating.
Replacing negative feelings around food with self-compassion and curiosity will allow you to try to understand the underlying emotions you may need to deal with.
Emotional Eating can be triggered by more than just feelings of guilt but also feelings such as boredom or sadness or anger.
It is important to realise this isn’t biological hunger and these feelings can trigger absent-minded picking or even an all-out binge.
In their book, Intuitive Eating, Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch illustrate an emotional eating spectrum beginning with mild feelings, needed to enjoy your food, to the opposite end which uses food as punishment.
The Emotional Eating Spectrum
The emotional eating spectrum can start with common and mild feelings such as pleasure which is a good feeling to have and you can read more about this in my post Finding Satisfaction from Food.
Comfort can also be linked to feel-good memories, for instance, a warming cup of hot chocolate when you arrive home from school on a winter’s day or a bowl of tomato soup your mum would give you when you were ill.
The issues arise however if food is the ONLY thing that comes to mind to take care of yourself when your feelings overwhelm you.
Food can be used as a distraction to avoid feelings such as boredom or anxiety.
Moving further down the scale to sedation and eating to stop yourself from experiencing feelings for a longer period of time.
This type of emotional eating can start to interfere with the ability to sense your intuitive signals of hunger and satiety.
More negative feelings of self-hatred and low self-esteem trigger eating for punishment for which no pleasure is derived.
Emotional Triggers
If you are finding that you are eating when you are not biologically hungry there is a good chance you are using food to cope with your feelings.
It may not be some great life-changing emotion it could just be getting through a day of life’s hassles.
Do you find any of the following emotions trigger you to reach for food:
- Boredom/Procrastination
- Reward/Bribery
- Excitement
- Soothing
- Love
- Frustration
- Anger/Rage
- Stress
- Anxiety
- Lethargy
- To be social
- Control/Releasing control
When you next reach for something to eat ask yourself:
- Am I biologically hungry? If YES, eat! If not…
- What am I feeling?
- What do I need?
- Ask for help/support – In order to get what you need, it could be just 15 minutes of peace!
Nurture yourself Without Food
When you get that gnawing feeling to eat but realise you are not actually biologically hungry what can you do to take care of yourself without food?
- Rest & Relax
- Take a walk in nature
- Listen to music
- Read a book
- Meditate/Take time to breathe
- Play a game or play with a pet
- Call a friend
- Find a hobby – Gardening, scrapbooking, creative writing
- Learn something new – a language, take an online class
- Pamper yourself – bubble bath, pedicure, manicure, face mask
It’s all about Balance
As with everything in life, being happy and healthy is all about finding balance.
If you have a ritual that involves food and gives you pleasure and comfort I am not suggesting for a minute that you stop this, pleasure and satisfaction are a major part of Intuitive Eating.
If however you are using food to distract from dealing with certain emotions and this is causing negative feelings and a cycle of using food in a negative way, Intuitive Eating can help you identify this and learn new ways to be kind to yourself and achieve your health and wellness goals.
January 2023 Challenge
Would you like to experience a C.A.L.M menopause journey?
Confident – Learn what is going on in your body and why
Aligned – Live in balance with your values
Lifestyle – design a plan that fits your individual lifestyle and menopause journey
Makeover – Transformation from barely surviving to THRIVING
Before you switch off for Christmas I would like to extend an invite to you for my January Challenge…
https://www.subscribepage.com/the-calm-menopause-january-challenge
This challenge is for…
Anyone on their menopause journey whether you are preparing, on the roller coaster of transition OR post-menopause and wanting to protect their future health and feel amazing.
If old strategies such as restrictive dieting and gruelling exercise no longer work to keep you in the shape you want to be.
You are over this New Year, New Me shit and just want to feel clear-headed, energetic and more like your old self without having to change your whole life to achieve it.
This challenge is for you if you are looking for something MORE in life. You are open-minded to explore your purpose and how you can truly take care of yourself so you can take care of those you love effectively.
Follow the link to learn more and sign up, I would love to show you an alternative way to achieve your health and well-being goals and create a positive menopause journey in 2023.
